a memory I didn't want to make...

Competition.  I love it and I'm scared of it.  I never really competed in any sports when I was younger, and so I'm always a bit nervous when it comes to formal competition.  And yet my personality is so competitive.  It hardly makes sense to me.

But I'm trying to get over that.  I've never raced my mountain bike before.  I told myself I didn't know how to pace myself, blahty blahty blah.  I decided in order to get over this silly fear, I was going to race my bike in the mountain man triathlon, with a team.  So I got myself a team, and the morning of, they ditched.  And I say that as politely as possible, because I love them, but I was pretty bummed.  I mean, after all that psyching myself up.

That was this morning.  I then spent the next 3 hours of class, texting various people, and asking around, trying to find a new team.  Long story short, I teamed up with Jeff Gilbert swimming and David Bowen running.

2 pm.  I'm supposed to be at the pool where the race starts.  I ride my bike out to my car, realize I've forgotten my car keys.  So I go back up to my room, where upon I find my keys in my pocket.  Genius.  So I go back out to my car, put the bike on the roof rack, and realize I've forgotten my bike lock.  So I get in the car, reverse...crunch....twice.  I forgot to put my front wheel in the car, and I just ran over it with both the front and back wheels of my car.  You cannot imagine how I felt at that particular moment.    

The wheel is a bit bent up, although not terrible; however, the front rotor (of the brake) is totally bent.  Bad news.  I call Lance, "Hey, come outside."  "Do you think I can still ride it?"  We run to the Tread Shed and he takes off the front rotor, sticks it in the vice, and yanks on it with all his might.  We ended up just leaving it off.  "You don't need a front brake, right?"

So, Jeff swims, and then we headed out to Beninngton Lake to finish the rest of the race.  (Maybe I should clarify that Bennington Lake itself is a puddle, which is why we ended up not doing the swim there.)  I get on my bike, and had the map explained to me twice, I was sure I was going to get lost.

Oh and did I mention that it rained ALL morning?  The trails were nasty muddy.  Sicknasty.  The race started out fine though.  I was having fun and feeling super good.  I did crash once because I had no front break, but whatever.  Nothing horrible.  But the mud started to collect on my bike.  The bike was twice as heavy as when I started.  Soon, I couldn't even shift, it was so clogged up.  Whatever, I can handle this, right?  Wrong.  So much mud and weeds collected on my rear derailleur, that it bent, and went right into my spokes.  Oh, wonderful!

Biker after biker passed me, as I stopped on the side of the trail and bent the derailleur back out, numerous times.  One guy even stopped to help me, which I really appreciated, but it was only a temporary fix.  Fifty feet later, it was back in my spokes.  Chelsea Moore stuck with me.  The whole time I was scared to death that I was going to ruin my bike.  I'd get on it and coast for a while, but it sounded awful.  And anytime I pedaled, it shifted my chain into the spokes, or just sent the whole rear derailleur right back into the spokes.

At this point, it will remain unsaid whether or not I was angry.  But I will leave it to your imagination.  Actually, no I won't...I want you to know that as I coasted down this awesome hill, I was yelling at the top of lungs.  (I was in the middle of nowhere, so I could.)  I eventually decided that riding my bike was a bad idea, got off the bike and ran it the rest of the ride, which was I think about a third of the distance.  And think of all the time I wasted trying to fix the dumb thing.  Makes me frustrated again just thinking about it.

As I ran alongside my bike, the sun decided to come out.  I took notice of its polite gesture.  It's really pretty out there at Bennington - I love fall.  Well, I eventually made it to the transition spot, and by that point I was at least having fun again.  But I was embarrassed, truly, deeply humiliated at how long that bike ride took me.  Deep down I know it wasn't my fault...  But I just keep thinking about how people must think I can't even ride a bike.  Ugh.

David finished the race awesomely, because he's pretty awesome, and he's also 6'10", so he's got a nice stride!

You know, when it's all over, I still loved it.  I love being involved.  And I can almost say that I loved this race.  Even though it didn't turn out how I wanted to...I raced, and I will race again.  Even though I now need to buy quite a few new parts for my bike, it is all worth it in my head somehow.  And when I got back in my car, and drove into the setting sun, I could still sing to The Fray at the top of my lungs.

You know what's funny is, after I ran over my bike wheel, I thought to myself, Today could not get any worse.  Famous last words.  But as so many people have told me, "Hey, you made a memory!"  And that I did.

Here's our team.  I look like a midget!

I different sort of transition than I had expected...

I only include this picture only because for some reason I didn't take any other pictures of it's complete nasty, muddiness...and this picture doesn't even show half of the mud that was previously on it.

And this is the fine gentlemen who will be spending some quality time fixing up my bike in the near future.